When I was around 24 years old, I remember having a conversation with my sister, Julie. We were discussing how all of my friends were getting married and I wasn't. She listened very well (like she always does) and then said something to this effect to me, "Don't worry, Carl. They'll all be getting divorced in about 6 years anyway. You can go to those parties." I thought that was hilarious.
About 6 years later, I was getting married myself. Of course, my marriage ended with a thud roughly 3 years after that, but, at least I experienced it for myself. I can report, though, the divorce "party" wasn't/isn't as fun as advertised.
As part of my plan to reset life, I took this gig on the cruise ship. It's worked out perfectly so far. I've gotten time back on the horn as well as lots of alone time to myself to get my shit together (not that I'm totally there yet…but…working on it). Many of my friends on board are in similar situations. Not exactly the same. Not everyone shares my personal story, but, they do have their own reasons for being here.
As my friend David McWilliams noted in his blog about ship life, this is a temporary job. A temporary life. A temporary situation. There is a sense on board that we are all here enjoying ourselves, but, each of us are also looking for the next chance to move forward with life. Most importantly, finding a place to set down roots on land. I think that people are looking for a connection, companionship, something more permanent in their lives. It's tough to find when working on a ship.
This feeling of interim-ness (is that a word?) makes for intriguing relationships out at sea. Everyone here lives very close to one another. We share a very small space all day and night. Privacy is at a premium. Some people take on the extra responsibility of supervisor positions just because the perk of living in a cabin without a roommate is so compelling.
I've found that relationships between co-workers develop in a bizarre way. We all know that people are going to leave at some point. We are all in the same boat (apologies for the pun) regarding this. "Hellos" are not so much guarded, but, said with the knowledge that the relationship that develops is virtually guaranteed to be short-term. Goodbyes are bittersweet, but, definitely understanding. When people sign off the ship they are usual very happy to be heading home. We are sad to see them go, but, happy for them at the same time.
"Home" is a concept for me at this point. It's where everyone else seems to want to be. However, for me, this ship is my home. Truthfully, I don't even really have an address. As employees, we all have common threads in reasons for being here. However, I feel a bit less transient than many of my friends on board. It's not a good or bad thing. It just is.
I took a lesson with Lasim Richards at FIU a couple weeks ago. He teaches jazz trombone and music business at FIU now, got his Masters in Performance form FIU, and also worked for RCCL for a bit while getting his Masters. He said something that stuck with me about cruise ships, "Ships serve a purpose. As long as you keep that in mind, you'll be all good." I completely agree. That purpose is being served for me right now. I'll keep an eye on it. When it's time to move on I'll know it and will make it so.
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